“I’ll find a way to manage until next Spring.”“Why then?”“When I can program full-time, I can channel all of that energy into programming. I haven’t been in my ‘zone’ in YEARS. I honestly found that more relaxing than just about anything I’ve ever done.”“You really find that relaxing?”“More than anything I do,” I replied. “Because I’m so focused on the task at hand, that it totally clears my mind. And before you ask, no, there is no reasonable way for me to do that between now and next Spring. I’m just going to have to keep things controlled with diet, exercise, and sufficient sleep.”“That part I have to leave to the medical doctors to manage, but I believe we can find some ways for you to break the cycle and stop before you lose control. It’s a matter of finding out what it is that relaxes you and takes your mind off whatever it is that’s egging you on.”“You’re kidding, right?” I chuckled.“Except that your self-medication didn’t work this time, did it?”“It did, to a point. If the. Maybe I am gay, or a transvestite fancier. That was so good,’ he thought to himself. He left the computer on and went to sit on the sofa. His mind was reeling with enjoyment and also fear of what his parents would have thought if they knew what he had just done. His whole life he had constantly sort recognition for anything he did or affection or love but had spent the entire time feeling unworthy and inadequate. He sat for about ten minutes just thinking and then he went straight back to the computer again and restarted the video of this tranny. He quickly ripped all his clothes off and started jerking off again. Very soon he came. He looked down at his cock and saw it covered in cum but just kept wanking. The video ended and another one started with a different cross dresser, basically doing the same thing. He couldn’t stop himself and within about five minutes was shooting again.That night he slept better than he’d slept in years. He almost felt like he was defying his parents and.
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